This year has been good to me and I am thankful.  And since it is three days past Thanksgiving I thought it was fitting to write about how thankful I am.  A few years ago I was in a dark place, bad job, depressing to be around and just about as negative as a person can be.  ON A DAILY BASIS!  Yes, I was the girl that people avoided at parties because SHE HAS NOTHING POSITIVE TO SAY!  I was the real life Debbie Downer!  But these days are oh so much better.

Although there is a job situation that I don’t like to speak of, I have a job and for that I am thankful.  It’s a good job, salary speaking, yet that is really all there is to speak about.  It pays the bills and now let’s move on shall we.  See that?  I didn’t complain and go on and on and on about how much I….see?  I think it is meaningless to elaborate.  On to the good stuff!

Madi lost her first tooth!  And she pulled it out herself!  And when I say she lost it?  She really lost it!  Gone.  Can’t find it.  She lost it so good that it might be in an0ther state.  And then I cried.  I am not sure why but this made me cry and I mean REALLY cry.  I am getting choked up about it now so wait while I get a tissue…Sniff!  This is where I take time out to blame Chris and myself at the same time.  That seems fair.  But don’t get me wrong – this is still the good stuff.  This is what life is about.  The sad at the moment but funny in a year or two kind of moment.  Back to the story…

Chris wasn’t supposed to pick Madi up until Monday (11/23) but I got some kind of swine, feline, bovine flu and thought it was not wise to expose Madi right before Thanksgiving.  They were going to be traveling and I didn’t want to expose the entire family to whatever it was that I had.  My fault for getting sick and of course she lost her tooth on Sunday night.  She called to tell me and I was surprised because I didn’t think the tooth was leaving anytime soon.  It was loose but I thought it would hang around for a while longer.  Wrong!  So let’s mark this event right now shall we?  Madi lost her first tooth (lower right front) on Sunday November 22 at approximately 6 pm while eating a grapefruit.

Now let’s talk about Chris…just to be fair.  I begged and pleaded and reminded and pleaded while begging some more “Please don’t lose her tooth!”  And what did he do?  He up and lost her tooth.  So I picked her up tonight, squealed when I saw that little gap where her baby tooth used to be and asked to see the tooth.  I sensed some panic from both of them and I KNEW!  I KNEW THE TOOTH WAS GONE.  I knew it before they started looking.  And then I cried.

I cried because the tooth fairy does not just fly to your house for an IOU.  She needs some proof and the empty spot in your mouth is not proof enough.  I mean what is she supposed to do, pry the sleeping child awake, force her to open her mouth so she can count her teeth?  And how is she supposed to keep track of the teeth?  For all she knows you are just trying to milk another fifty cents from a tooth you lost and collected on 3 weeks ago.  Yes it is silly, I cried.  I am hoping the tooth turns up somewhere.

In other news, Taylor is 18.  An adult.  Hang on while I get another tissue.  This is weird for me and exciting and a little sad.  Bitter sweet.  He is no longer the little Tay-Tay and hasn’t been for a long time.  But to think that college is looming just around the corner makes me want to spend as much time with him as I possibly can.  I have a feeling (just a feeling) that he will be leaving, like REALLY leaving for college.  Maybe a college that is not within driving distance and I am scared.  We have been so close for so long I can’t fathom how this will change my life.  People reading this (not sure there are any people reading this, I just picture imaginary people – and they all look like Morgan Freeman), they may think that statement is strange but I am very involved in Taylor’s life.  I have to schedule my weeks with both Madi and Taylor in mind.  I do this because that is the way it has always been.  This is his last year of high school and that makes it all the more important for me to be there.  I see big things for this kid.  I am already so proud of him for who he is and what he has accomplished.  And yet I know there is so much he is going to do with his life.  He is just that kind of person.  But I know the chances are he will be preparing for that life further away from me than he has ever been.  So instead of being a Debbie Downer, I am going to drive to as many events of his that I can manage, cheer him on and hope that time slows down a little bit along the way.

I am also freaking out about the time because Ryen will be starting college soon too.  He is going back and I am supportive and proud of him.  I know how hard it is, he knows how hard it is and the January start date is getting close.  So I feel that time is moving a bit to quickly and our time together is soon going to be cut in half.  I am not liking that idea one bit but it is only for a short time right?  Right!  January is a good month of us – I met Ryen on a cold January night (the 23rd to be exact) and although it feels like I have known him for so much longer, it has not quite been a year yet.  But that year is getting close – that first anniversary that will be celebrated in a big way!  He has been good to me, to us!  He has been good FOR me and changed me in ways that I am so very grateful for.  I didn’t think it was possible for someone to MAKE you a better person and yet I believe he has.  So this passing of time has been on my mind pretty heavily and I guess I just want to cherish, savor and most of all remember all these wonderful times with all the amazing people in my life.  I have not named them all of course – but I am thankful for each and every day that I have with you!  I am blessed!

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you!

The most important event, next to starting kindergarten, is Madi’s birthday.  We have decided to have the party at the park.  We had her first two birthdays at this park so she was all for it.  I want Madi to have a wonderful birthday.  She will 6 years old – WOW!  Chris and I talked about having the party and agreed that it would be silly to have separate parties.  I hope that everyone is able to come.  The decision to have the party at the park was in hopes that everyone would feel more comfortable attending.  I hope it works out for Madi’s sake.

In other news…we found a new home for Chloe.  Ryen and I realized that she was not happy in the back yard.  Although there is plenty of room for her to run, there is just not enough for her to do.  She is bored, she told us she wanted a farm and Ryen found her one.  We didn’t want to let her go but it is what she needed.  We received a call from the nice ladies that adopted her.  They said they turned her loose on their 6 acres, she headed for the pond, jumped in and swam with their ducks.  This made us happy and we feel we did what was best for her.  Madi is handling it ok.  She wants another dog and I decided that the answer was no.  Two is enough.  More than enough.

So back to the October discussion – I am not sure what I am going to do.  I do know that I will have a roof over my head, food to eat and a car to drive.  A job?  Things aren’t looking to good in that area and the severance pay certainly won’t last forever.  Unemployment is not something that was meant to live on so that is not a long term option.  I guess my hope at this point is that sometime between now and November the job market will pick up and I will land the job that I am supposed to have.  Until then I will keep submitting resumes and waiting for the phone to ring.  Oh and praying, I have been doing a lot of that lately.